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I just returned from Gay Freedom Camp at Easton Mountain, which was their way of celebrating the Independence Day weekend here in the US. We had talks (thanks Steve Schwartzberg! I’ll keep thinking about your “It’s just a thought” concept), workshops, and other activities. One of the strongest impressions for me was at the opening circle, John Stasio invited us to think about what we wanted to get out the weekend. We didn’t have to have exactly the weekend planned by the organizers. We could choose.
I thought about it and decided that what I was looking for was intimacy. I wanted to have some really special private time with men whom I love and adore, and share that with them. By this I didn’t mean a lot of naked rolling around (not that there’s anything wrong with that), but having some conversations where I feel I was connecting deeply with whomever I was talking with. This manifested itself for me by having numerous times lying in one of the many hammocks with a (new or established) friend and just talking about life and where I was at that moment, and also listening to where this particular man was mentally at that particular moment.
It also became for me about freedom to choose not to do things. There was an afternoon where there where a number of workshops that I could have gone to, but I chose not to do any of them. It was very freeing to know that I was stopping and asking myself what would be the best for me, and then making a conscious decision with all the facts.
I’ve noticed in working with many clients that what is most frustrating for them is to feel that you don’t have a choice about your future. I also get this sense from the general population too. While we might not have the power over the circumstances that happen to us, we do have the choice about what we will do in each situation.
Are you in the career you want to be? Are you living in the city you want to live in? Are you feeling stuck? These are signs that your letting things happen to you and not looking at your choices. Your particular life situations might limit your choices, but you still do have some choices. The more you practice making choices, the easier it is for you.
Are you making choices today that serve you?