I met a friend this past weekend who just moved to the Boston area a few months ago from California, and he was looking for ways that he could connect up with other people to play tennis. As someone new to the area, he seemed a bit confused as to how he could find out where things were happening. I mentioned that he should look in the Community section of BayWindows.com for all the GLBT groups in the area, and that I also had a friend who played in a gay tennis league not too far from where he lives.

This got us to talking more about how the Boston area always makes connections by groups and common interest. (I’ve written about this before in my blog. See the article here). He then commented that it also worked when he had been at a club that there were a group of guys that kept to themselves, but when he was introduced to them through someone he knew, they all talked with him and could reintroduce himself the next time he saw them. We here in the chilly North tend to want to know the connections between people before we make approaches.

As usual, I see a parallel with job search. If you are trying to get a job or moving into a new field, the people you want to meet are those that you want to show that you have something in common with. People aren’t going to want to meet you because you’re nice; there are a lot of nice people in the world. We tend to make our choices about which movie to go see, which TV to buy, or which restaurant to dine at given the comments of our trusted sources.

So, what stories about you are your friends and colleagues telling about you, and are they making others what to meet you?

PS – Remember to listen to the Quest of Life Podcast on Friday at 1 p.m. EST to hear me live (see previous blogpost about that!)